Self development has been my passion since I was in high school, and although I read a lot of books about this topic, but online consumable material is always my favorite, for its short to the point benefit. I haven’t counted exactly how much content I’ve read but it’s definitely more than five hundred various material from articles to online webinars and YouTube videos. I’m also passionate about psychology and I’ve taken couple of advance courses in social psychology and positive psychology. So in most of what I read and write I try to choose information that is not against science and most importantly practical. This all inspired me to write this article and give you the best conclusions I reached that will hopefully teach you some stuff you can apply to your life and improve it, just like it improved my life.
To start with I think the biggest lesson for me was that most of self help material both offline and online are worthless and here’s why; first not everyone life is the same so you can’t apply the same tips on someone else life with different context. Second if you find something goes well with your life it will be either an instant motivation that you will forget after reading it or after watching it if it’s a video, or it will be a tip that will only help you if you apply it constantly on your life, and trust me most of people when they see a practical tip they won’t apply it because it require work and practice and people tend to read more than doing.
But here’s what I would say, although I mentioned most of self development content are not worth it but it’s definitely better than reading nothing about self development. Also the small percentage of valuable content you going to encounter it will be very very valuable, so sometimes it’s worth researching and wasting sometime in order to find the golden tips. Another thing I would say if you encounter some content high in value and practical, in order to not make it worthless, you have to apply the tips and what the expert is asking you to do instead of just reading it for the sake of reading, and a lot of the golden tips might make you get out of your comfort zone or break some habits, but it’s definitely worth it, and this lead me to my second lesson I learned with self development: whatever kind of development you’re trying to do to yourself, it will require you to work hard for it. Get out of your comfort zone, and face a fear you have, and this is definitely the best part because otherwise you won’t notice change is happening, and because it will teaches you good discipline, which makes you embrace a growth mindset.
Lesson three, before you spend a lot of time on self development, you should figure out if you have major inner issues that are stopping you from thriving and I mean by major issues if you have a mental health problem like depression, or if someone is threatening you, or you’re working more than 12 hours a day. Basically if there’s a core problem you’re going through, you should fix it before you focus on self development. Yes sometimes self development stuff can help you fix major problems or mental disorders like depression, but most of the time you should go to a therapist when you’re going through a mental disorder, and you should change your job if it require you to work all day long etc..
Lesson four, all the previous taught me that the success you get from true self development is amazing and very useful and most of people are not really successful because they don’t really focus on self development, and I’m not talking about focusing on worthless self development content, I’m talking in general people don’t really care about growing and they’re satisfied with their own issues and they don’t have the want for discovering themselves very well or solve their internal issues because they’re busy with their comfort zone lifestyle. The great thing about improving your self is that most likely it’s the only thing you can control from other aspects in your life. Yes your atmosphere and society plays a big role in shaping you but it’s a lot harder to change them than to change yourself, and the moment you become good version of yourself you will start actually to see your atmosphere and other aspects in your life in a better way, so take advantage of that and become more successful and fulfilled.
Lastly, since not only self development is my passion but also social innovation, and since it’s been my main career for the past couple of years, I figured out a way to combine these two passions by creating Empower X. It’s basically a self development online platform that help people discover themselves and improve their emotional intelligence (EQ). EQ is more important than IQ not just in social life, but for the career life too. Top businesses for the past couple of years are focusing on hiring people with higher EQ since communication skills, leadership, team work, stress management etc.. Are all part of EQ not IQ, and because the main ingredient of EQ is self awareness, with Empower X the main focus is to provide you with activities and content that will improve your self awareness and take it to the next level.